Adulthood has a sneaky, destructive way of killing your sense of play. At some point, the mindless carefree deployment of imagination and self-generated entertainment gives way to the desire for constant productivity, to always be “adulting,” for as much as I am loath to use the term.
Research suggests that might be a mistake.
In an essay published in The Conversation by Scott Duncan of Auckland University of Technology and Melody Smith of the University of Auckland, Waipapa Taumata Rau, adults benefit from playfulness just as much as children do, and probably a lot more than we’re willing to admit in a world in which adults are expected to either be deathly serious or tip too far into the realm of play that they make the whole endeavor look bad.
Studies show adults who regularly engage in playful activities cope better with stress, experience more positive emotions, and report greater life satisfaction. Playfulness is linked to resilience and emotional intelligence. If you are genuinely good at being able to read the vibe of the room while managing your own and other people’s emotions, all the while empathetically responding to external stimuli almost as a knee-jerk reaction, then you are probably giving yourself enough time to play.
Makes sense, considering that, according to the essay, observational research suggests that playful adults tend to be more socially connected.
“Play” doesn’t necessarily mean doing childlike things like smashing together some action figures while making pew pew sounds or scheduling in some strictly regimented sessions of mandatory playtime fun. Adult play is inherently different from childhood playtime. It’s more about a mindset. It can be physical, creative, social, or imaginative, which are some general terms that encompass a whole lot of pursuits, from music to storytelling to something as simple as doing a thing because it brings you a simple, uncomplicated joy.
There’s also evidence of a possible neurobiological link between playfulness and cognitive health in older adults, hinting that staying playful may help keep the brain flexible over time.
When adults and children engage in unstructured play together, hierarchies weaken, which might sound terrifying to someone for whom those hierarchies are how they defined themselves in relation to others, but if they were to put that aside, it would probably help strengthen their relationships as shared enjoyment takes over.
Duncan and Smith’s research with New Zealand families found that supporting unstructured play reduced stress and strengthened connection, making play an ordinary part of daily life rather than a rare indulgence.
The larger issue may be cultural. When play is seen as embarrassing or unserious, it disappears. When it’s normalized, it becomes contagious. That is a happy reality that some aspect of our modern world would rather you didn’t know or would rather you outgrow. Thankfully, this evidence suggests that we never outgrow it, but we definitely do forget how to make room for it.
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