Welcome to Late Night Roundup, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.
Super No
A right-wing advocacy group, Turning Point USA, will stage an alternative to Bad Bunny’s performance at the Super Bowl this Sunday, called The All-American Halftime Show.
On Tuesday’s “The Daily Show,” Michael Kosta joked that only “the radical woke communists who hate America” are excited to “watch a performance by the most popular musician in America.”
“But good news: There is a halftime alternative and it’s not just turning that seven-layer dip into a seven-layer poop.” — MICHAEL KOSTA
“According to the press release, the show is called ‘The All-American Halftime Show,’ in a font that is called ‘T-Shirt on a Quiet, Angry Dad at Disney World.’” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“As you may have noticed from the poster there, Kid’s not rockin’ this one alone. He’ll be joined by country singers Brantley Gilbert, Gabby Barrett, and Lee Brice. Powerhouse lineup. Also appearing are Gary Lee Grant, Gilby Branlet, Dilly Barrett, Tandy Breitbart, Billy Gidly, and Baby Bilbo.” — STEPHEN COLBERT, listing fake country musicians
“Woo, huh? Man, that is a real who’s who of ‘Who?’” — MICHAEL KOSTA
“I don’t want to disappoint anybody, but we’ve just learned that Billy Gidly cannot make it due to health reasons. But in tribute, Trilly Gilson and Brandi de Gamble will be performing a Billy Gidly medley.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“We’ve got Gabby Barrett, Brantley Gilbert, Garby Billet, Billy Garbet, Breely Grabbers. Bobby Glabert, Gaggy Bobbles, Barnacle Gasperty, Babette Gingletree, Hologram Hulk Hogan, Gregorlee Banklebob, Kid Rock and Kid Rock’s father, Adult Rock.” — MICHAEL KOSTA, also listing fake country musicians
“Now, if you want to attend this alternate halftime show, ya can’t. Because it is unclear what venue will host, which I believe is fitting, because Kid Rock is often unclear what venue he’s in.” — STEPHEN COLBERT
“But they have announced the event will be available to stream on the actual real platforms TBN, DW+, Charge and Rumble. Also they’re negotiating to stream on Crunch, Cramble, Hunkle, Krampus and ParamountPlus.” — STEPHEN COLBERT, listing streaming platforms, some fake
The Punchiest Punchlines (Party Crime Edition)
“Well, guys, the fallout from the latest Epstein files release continues and, last night, President Trump’s Justice Department said that it is ‘not a crime’ to party with Epstein. You had years to come up with an excuse, and that’s what you went with? No. If someone said that to you at a Super Bowl party, you would slowly back away and call the police.” — JIMMY FALLON
“Trump was, like, [imitating Trump] ‘partying with Epstein doesn’t make me a criminal. The 34 criminal convictions do.’” — JIMMY FALLON
“Yeah, they said that it’s not a crime to party with Jeffrey Epstein, which is pretty much like saying it’s not a crime to have brunch with Jeffrey Dahmer.” — JIMMY FALLON
“That’s right. It’s also not a crime to borrow a bottle of baby oil from Diddy.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
“They’re not crimes, stop being such a buzz kill, everybody. Our forefathers had to fight for our right to party with Mr. Epstein.” — JIMMY KIMMEL
The Bits Worth Watching
The “Have I Got News For You” star and humor writer Amber Ruffin pressed Seth Meyers on why he turned down jokes she wrote for him for “Late Show” on Tuesday’s episode of the series.
What We’re Excited About on Wednesday Night
The comedian and television star Ms. Pat will promote Season 5 of “The Ms. Pat Show” on Wednesday’s “Daily Show.”
Also, Check This Out
From 1926’s “The Flying Ace” on Criterion Channel to 2016’s “Moonlight” on HBO Max, here are 10 films to stream for Black History Month.
The post Michael Kosta Blasts the Super Bowl Halftime Alternative appeared first on New York Times.
