Being gentle with yourself is no easy feat in today’s world. In fact, I’d argue it’s become nearly impossible to practice patience, self-love, and forgiveness in today’s highly critical society. When it all gets too loud, however, it helps to log off of social media and open a book.
Reading in and of itself is a form of self-care—that is, if you’re consuming the right content. If you’re looking for books that encourage you to be kinder to yourself, here are four to add to your to-read list right now.
1. This I Believe: The Personal Philosophies of Remarkable Men and Women by Jay Allison
I found This I Believe: The Personal Philosophies of Remarkable Men and Women by Jay Allison in a random New Jersey thrift store when I needed it the most. Little did I know how much each simple story and individual philosophy would shift my perspective and help me heal from one of the most challenging periods of my life. This book reminds us we’re all humans with different lived experiences, personalities, strengths, and personal beliefs—each just as valid as the next.
Synopsis: An inspiring collection of the personal philosophies of a group of remarkable men and women
“Based on the National Public Radio series of the same name, This I Believe features eighty essayists—from the famous to the unknown—completing the thought that begins the book’s title. Each piece compels readers to rethink not only how they have arrived at their own personal beliefs but also the extent to which they share them with others.
“Featuring a well-known list of contributors—including Isabel Allende, Colin Powell, Gloria Steinem, William F. Buckley Jr., Penn Jillette, Bill Gates, and John Updike—the collection also contains essays by a Brooklyn lawyer; a part-time hospital clerk from Rehoboth, Massachusetts; a woman who sells Yellow Pages advertising in Fort Worth, Texas; and a man who serves on the state of Rhode Island’s parole board.
“The result is a stirring and provocative trip inside the minds and hearts of a diverse group of people whose beliefs–and the incredibly varied ways in which they choose to express them—reveal the American spirit at its best.”
2. Healing the Shame that Binds You by John Bradshaw
As someone who grew up with debilitating OCD, I am no stranger to shame. In fact, I’d go as far as to say that it’s my most experienced emotion.
However, I hadn’t realized just how often I was operating from a place of chronic shame—how much it was dictating my actions, how I viewed myself and others, and how I showed up in my most intimate relationships. That is, until I read Healing the Shame that Binds You by John Bradshaw.
Synopsis: “‘I used to drink,’ writes John Bradshaw, ‘to solve the problems caused by drinking. The more I drank to relieve my shame-based loneliness and hurt, the more I felt ashamed.’
“Shame is the motivator behind our toxic behaviors: the compulsion, co-dependency, addiction and drive to superachieve that breaks down the family and destroys personal lives. This book has helped millions identify their personal shame, understand the underlying reasons for it, address these root causes and release themselves from the shame that binds them to their past failures.”
3. The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You by Elaine N. Aron
I picked up this book when I was deep in a self-loathing spiral in my mid-20s. At the time, I felt like I had ruined my life, sabotaging any chance of happiness or fulfillment. I viewed my sensitivity as a negative trait, as that’s how the world had referred to it—at least, in my previous experience.
However, Elaine N. Aron’s The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You helped me fall in love with myself—not despite, but rather because of my sensitivity.
Synopsis: “Do you have a keen imagination and vivid dreams? Is time alone each day as essential to you as food and water? Are you ‘too shy’ or ‘too sensitive’ according to others? Do noise and confusion quickly overwhelm you? If your answers are yes, you may be a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP).
“Most of us feel overstimulated every once in a while, but for the HSP, it’s a way of life. In this groundbreaking book, Dr. Elaine Aron, a clinical psychologist, workshop leader, and an HSP herself, shows you how to identify this trait in yourself and make the most of it in everyday situations. Drawing on her many years of research and hundreds of interviews, she shows how you can better understand yourself and your trait to create a fuller, richer life.”
4. The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success: A Practical Guide to the Fulfillment of Your Dreams by Deepak Chopra
Deepak Chopra is one of the most popular spiritual/new age gurus, and for good reason. His book, The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success: A Practical Guide to the Fulfillment of Your Dreams, redefines success as we know it, urging us to look inward and find stillness within ourselves.
Oftentimes, when we’re struggling to practice kindness or self-love, we’re operating from a wounded place. Perhaps our ego is bruised, or maybe we just feel too far gone to recover from life’s relentless traumas. Chopra’s work offers grounded encouragement and reminds us act in alignment with our hearts.
Synopsis: “Based on natural laws that govern all of creation, this book shatters the myth that success is the result of hard work, exacting plans, or driving ambition. Instead, Deepak Chopra offers a life-altering perspective on the attainment of success: When we understand our true nature and learn to live in harmony with natural law, a sense of well-being, good health, fulfilling relationships, and material abundance spring forth easily and effortlessly.”
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