If you’ve ever used dating apps, my heart goes out to you…
Aaaand you likely know just how copy-and-paste many of the profiles are. Regardless of their gender, dating app users tend to reuse the same bios or cliches to attract attention. For example, “I love to travel” might seem like a harmless, alluring “about me” phrase, but it’s so overused that many people are starting to view it as a red flag.
According to Christopher Alesich, relationship expert and CEO of Sister Wives, this is a common yet cringeworthy trend called “template dating.” This occurs when you default to standard dating terms or profile trends just to secure matches.
The problem? You shouldn’t be trying to fit in—you should want to stand out.
What Is Template Dating?
Template dating basically involves using cliches to attract attention on dating apps. One common example is the statement “I love to travel.” Even if it’s true, it’s become such a go-to phrase that some users view it as a turnoff.
“When I see ‘I love to travel’ in a bio, I see it as a beige flag and a form of template dating,” says Alesich. “It’s not quite a red flag, but a glaring signal that someone’s playing it safe with copy-paste advice from 2015. Show people why you’re interesting, don’t just state the obvious.”
Template dating often makes people feel less connected, as it communicates what you think the other person wants to hear.
“A decade ago, this made you sound interesting. But now? You’re one of six people in a row saying the exact same thing,” says Alesich. “You’re competing with thousands of profiles in your area, and most of them sound the same. People need to give more of themselves to gain matches. Dating has evolved, but so many bios clearly haven’t.”
Why You Should Avoid a Travel-Focused Dating Profile
If you love to travel, you certainly don’t need to hide that from potential dating app matches. However, don’t rely on it as your sole form of connection. With nearly 1 in 6 dating profiles relying on travel or adventure clichés, you’re likely not going to stand out.
“Loving travel isn’t the problem,” explains Alesich. “It’s that declaring it doesn’t make you stand out … People think it makes them sound cultured and adventurous, but when everyone sounds the same, it stops being interesting and lumps you in a category. And once you’re placed there, you become easy to scroll past.”
In my opinion, you should never hide the parts of your life you’re most passionate about. So, if that truly is traveling, use your photos to show rather than tell.
“Writing this in your bio is the equivalent of saying ‘I like to have fun’—it’s true, but tells potential matches almost nothing about you,” Alesich says. “Don’t get caught in the trap.”
Additionally, Alesich recommends replacing generic claims with personal stories. For example, instead of just stating you love to visit new places, bring up a specific travel anecdote that conveys your adventurous spirit. Move away from universal experiences and focus on what makes you unique.
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