Are you tired of the toxic dating trends yet? (I know I am.)
Look, awareness is key to prevention. If you can familiarize yourself with all these unhealthy patterns exhibited in today’s dating scene, you might just avoid wasted time and heartbreak.
That being said, one of the most common yet toxic dating trends of 2025 is paperclipping, which isn’t as innocent as it sounds.
Let’s dive in.
What Is Paperclipping?
Paperclipping is yet another harsh dating trend that involves circling back to an ex-partner or casual hookup merely out of loneliness or boredom. Obviously, the concept is not new—daters have been revisiting past flings for ages. However, there appears to be a resurgence in this behavior, which is fueled by selfish intent and not an actual desire to rekindle.
According to a study by Sister Wives on the top dating trends of 2025, paperclipping is in the top 10 most toxic.
“Re-entering someone’s life without the intention of staying is very similar to submarining, but is likely more common after serious relationships where emotions are even more heightened, leading to increased risk of trauma and trust issues,” Dyllan Watkins, a Neuroscience BSc holder, explained to Sister Wives.
When it comes to “paperclipping,” the effort is also concerningly low. The person isn’t actually trying to rebuild a broken relationship. In fact, they might not even be looking to meet up. Rather, they’re just checking whether they still have access to you.
According to Bruce Y. Lee, M.D., M.B.A., in his Psychology Today article on the topic, “Paperclipping is when someone you know pops up every now and then on one or more of your messaging platforms to ask you some frivolous questions—maybe just a simple ‘Hey, what’s up?’ or ‘How you doing?’ Whatever the specifics, when you answer, the conversation rarely ends up going very far. You might not even get a response to your response.”
Of course, those who participate in the paperclipping dating trend typically have zero intention of actually revisiting a relationship. Instead, they prefer to keep you on the back burner in case they get lonely, “paperclipping” you for a rainy day.
How to Handle Paperclipping
If you suspect someone is paperclipping you, your best bet is to simply ignore them and move on with your life.
I know, I know…when there’s a long and deep history with this person, it can feel impossible not to respond or at least entertain the idea. However, by continuing to give them what they want, they will take, take, take with zero consideration for your feelings. You’re basically allowing them to waste your precious time and energy.
On the off chance that they really do want to repair or pursue a relationship with you, they’ll need to try a little harder than a simple “Heyy” or “How’ve you been?” When you know your worth, you show others how you expect to be treated, naturally weeding out those who can’t meet your standards.
Of course, there’s also the option of calling out this vicious behavior, forcing the person to confront their selfish ways or be upfront with their intentions.
“The advantage of this tack over simply ignoring the messages is that a more direct approach may clear up any misunderstandings,” Lee wrote in his article. “It could quickly distinguish the paperclippers from those genuinely looking for an opening to go deeper with you.”
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