I fumbled my vacation
As you may have noticed, I wasn’t at work last week. (Thanks, Paige, for filling in!) I decided to ease into the year sans meetings, emails, or circling back.
My intention for taking the first full week of the year off was simple: to be intentional about rest so that I can spend the next two quarters running at full speed. I had planned to do only one joyous activity per day.
I started the week by taking my son to a pottery painting class and then a massage on Tuesday. Wednesday was spent decluttering the garage, followed by doing absolutely nothing but catching up on Netflix series on Thursday. I capped the week off with a Friday facial.
Despite sticking to my one activity per day, I still had to get the kids off to school. I had more time, so I also offered to pick them up, too. I cooked all of my meals (because have you seen this economy?!) and I finally joined Costco. I felt very productive, but also very tired.
By Saturday, I realized I had done this OOO thing all wrong — but I wasn’t exactly sure how it happened? So I reached out to the former president of the American Psychological Association, Dr. Thema Bryant, to examine my time-off missteps.
“There is a win. You set good intentions, and you set a plan,” Bryant, who’s also the author of “Homecoming: Overcome Fear and Trauma to Reclaim Your Whole Authentic Self,” told me. “Intention doesn’t equal impact.”
Bryant said my mistake was clear. “You traded labor. You did less of one job and replaced it with more of another job,” she explained. “The reason the exhaustion surprises you is because you’re like, ‘but I didn’t do any work this week.’ But the driving, the cooking, the baths, these things are work.”
For you, it may not be your home life, but the incessant accumulation of small tasks or tiny decisions — whether it’s text message triage, planning meet-ups with friends, or caretaking your parents — can eat up ease while on vacation.
In the future, Bryant suggested that I remember that childcare and home labor are still work, even if they are labors of love. She added that instead of taking on more at home, outsource as much as I can afford.
Bryant also left me with this reminder: “Embrace the truth that ‘I’m worthy of rest from it all.'”
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