Let’s face it: The holidays aren’t always the happiest time of the year.
We’re busier than usual, scurrying around buying presents, mailing cards and attending events. We’re battling the nasty winter illnesses that pop up in December. And we’re often navigating complicated family dynamics while feeling pressured to create perfect memories.
The result: overwhelming stress that can sap our energy or focus. On social media, that feeling is sometimes referred to as “functional freeze.”
Though it is not a formal psychological term or diagnosis, the topic has taken off in numerous videos and posts online. In one TikTok that has been viewed more than four million times, a therapist explains functional freeze as a state of mind driven by chronic stress. You’re still capable of getting things done, but you feel as if you’re “just existing” and mainly going through the motions.
The video drew more than 1,700 comments. “Finally I feel seen,” one user wrote.
We asked psychologists to weigh in on the term and offer solutions for feeling better.
What exactly is functional freeze?
The meaning of “functional freeze” can vary depending on who is describing it.
The phrase was popularized on social media, peaking in internet searches in 2024 and garnering media attention from outlets like Today.com, CNBC and Forbes.
Dave Boyd, a marriage and family therapist in Olympia, Wash., had never heard of it until about two years ago when a patient, a young mother, showed him a video that she had watched on TikTok.
His first reaction was: That’s “not a thing,” he recalled. But he was curious.
“Tell me why this resonates with you?” he asked. In the end, her explanation helped him better understand some of her biggest concerns, which included feeling overwhelmed, helpless and trapped in a high-stress environment.
People have equated functional freeze with being “tired and wired” — anxiety mixed with fatigue. Others have said that “freeze mode” is similar to “dissociating, escaping” or feeling like you’re “in a fog,” even though you’re able to get things done when you need to. Others explain that, though they might be participating in social activities, they aren’t enjoying themselves and feel “emotionally numb.”
In that sense, the term “functional freeze” could potentially be referring to many different things, said Janina Fisher, a clinical psychologist and an expert in treating trauma. The symptoms that social media users are describing might overlap with seasonal affective disorder, depersonalization or the long-term effects of past trauma, Dr. Fisher said.
While you won’t find “functional freeze” in a psychology textbook, the term is still important, experts say.
This wording “gives people a language for describing what they’re experiencing that has a certain kind of dignity,” Dr. Fisher said. Simply saying “I’ve lost my motivation” isn’t quite as compelling, she added.
What does it look like to be in a functional freeze?
This, too, can vary depending on the source.
In some social media posts, people showed themselves scrolling endlessly on their phone. One woman sat in her towel for 15 minutes after showering; someone else lay in bed under the covers. Another simply sat and held her head in her hands.
The word “freeze” suggests a survival instinct, but the inertia in these videos isn’t a fleeting reaction to danger. Rather, it is the result of continually keeping it together to do the things that have to get done.
So, maybe the most important text messages receive a reply. Work assignments get done. The children are fed. But you can hardly motivate yourself to do anything beyond the essentials.
These feelings may arise from being overwhelmed by the demands of everyday life, said George A. Bonanno, a professor of clinical psychology at Teachers College, Columbia University and the author of “The End of Trauma.”
They could also be a product of information overload, he added. Some of what we see online or in the news can be disturbing or upsetting to the point where we feel overcome.
“Our brains are really wired to detect and react to threat as fast as possible,” he said. “We’re constantly being tweaked now.”
How do you break out of functional freeze?
First, the experts said, think about why the term is resonating with you.
Is it because you’re overwhelmed? Is it largely because of your job? The state of the world? All of this and more?
Dr. Bonanno recommended zeroing in on your main concerns and then addressing those one by one. For example, if you are feeling emotionally numb, is there something in particular that you want to be numb to? If so, can you think about how to address that?
If you’re exhausted: Are you getting enough sleep? If not, how can you sleep more?
For general feelings of stress and overwhelm, Dr. Fisher suggested trying to stimulate your autonomic nervous system, which controls heart rate, digestion, breathing and blood pressure. To do this, she recommended meditation, yoga, tai chi or running to tune into your body and feel calmer.
You might also consider speaking with a therapist if your symptoms are especially troublesome or persistent — it’s possible that you might have a diagnosable mental health condition. Or, you might just need a safe way to explore what’s on your mind.
Above all, remember that you have agency. Try to avoid telling yourself that you’re “unable to function and therefore I can’t do things,” Dr. Bonanno said.
“You’re not helpless to change it,” he added. Humans have “enormous capacity” to adapt and move beyond adversity.
Christina Caron is a Times reporter covering mental health.
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