It’s Cyber Monday, which means it’s time to zip up that black pleather bodysuit, swallow the deals deals deals pill, and descend upon the Amazon matrix like a sleuthy, price-slashing spider. We’re only going to be spending more time in our hovel during the winter, so outfitting it for cozy movie nights and intimate dinner parties (mostly between us and our Sylvanians) is the move.
Cyber Monday is a great time to make big and small purchases alike, whether you need new lighting charger cables to stay juiced and b00sted, or a 4K television that’s $200 off. Don’t let our Bottega boots give you the wrong impression, dude—we strike while the iron is hot, and the iron is hot when stuff goes on sale, so we cherish all of the web’s best Cyber Monday deals. We’re gonna get a KitchenAid stand mixer, but we’re gonna wait until it’s $80 off. We’re gonna stuff our drawers with Dickies, but when they can be scored on sale. We’re wrapping our faces in Wayfarers, but not for full price. We’re gonna replace that pair of AirPods that fell into the sewer grate, but we’re waiting till Cyber Monday to add to cart. Why? Because we’re smart, and we hunted down the best deals for you, but also for ourselves.
The best Amazon Cyber Monday deals aren’t just on tech and electronics, but home goods, cooking appliances, fashion, fancy skincare, sex toys, and anything else that has made you think, “Damn, I really ought to be a person who owns one of those before people get suspicious.” Here are our top picks for the best bang for your buck over at Amazon.
The best Amazon Cyber Monday deals on tech and electronics
A sparkling 4K TV
A Lenovo laptop for less than 500 bucks
A portable mini projector for impressing your Netflix ‘n’ chill guest
Apple laptops, smartwatches, and AirPods…
… and Apple MFi-certified charging cables
No more frying your iPhone, Brad. That thing cost you a lot of your goblin coins, and deserves a swift charge by an Apple MFi stamp of approval cable like this one, which is on-sale in a five-pack.
There’s no better time to get a new speaker
Save BIG on powerful speakers from Marshall, JBL, and more, including the hot gift Marshall Stanmore II, the Dolby Atmos-equipped Echo Studio (Amazon’s competitor to the Sonos One), and JBL’s popular Flip 5.
Save $160 on Dyson vacs that are top-of-the-line suckers
Noise-cancelling earbuds (that won’t fall out of your ears)
Who knew that we had the same ears as Dr. Dre? These noise-cancelling earbuds by Beats are compatible with Apple and Android, and some would say they’re better made to stay in your ears than AirPods. Plus, they have incredible sound quality and come in chic neutral shades.
Grab a Garmin watch (sexier than a Fitbit, but just as smart)
The Best Amazon Cyber Monday Deals on Fashion and Footwear
Men’s and women’s Dickies apparel
Dickies is back, baby! Grab the brand’s signature work pants, coveralls, jackets and more for under $50.
The best Ray-Ban classic sunnies on sale
Lots of Oakley sunglasses are also on sale, so wrap up
Adidas deals on parade
New Balance sneakers
… Is it time for Crocs?
Yes. A thousand times yes. This pair of swanky black Crocs also has a fuzzy lining to keep those toes toasty during colder months and midnight snack runs. Best of all, they’re up to 30% off.
Grab Orolay’s viral winter coats
Save big on the internet-famous puffers that are cute, ultra cozy, and more affordable than ever.
Plus more winter coats from Levi’s, Tommy Hilfiger, and Calvin Klein
While you’re at it, stock up on Calvin Klein underwear
It’s a modern classic because it’s the comfiest, the softest, and lasts forever—and it’s on sale for Cyber Monday.
The Best Amazon Cyber Monday Deals on Cookware and Kitchen Goods
Save $250 on a top-of-the-line Vitamix
This cult-favorite chef’s knife
Save big on top-rated coffee makers and espresso machines
The Nespresso Creatista Plus get top marks for being small on countertop footprint and big on capabilities. “It makes the BEST cappuccino ever,” says the top review, and it gets an overall rating of 4.6 out of five stars on Amazon. Plus, it’s 30% off, meaning you save nearly $200. For home barista beginners, try the new L’Or machine, at just $129 right now, it will more than cover your espresso-drink bill within just a couple of months when you start going homemade.
Score Dutch ovens from Lodge for under $100
The best Cyber Monday air fryer deal
A KitchenAid stand mixer, aka the GOAT countertop appliance for bakers
What can we say that hasn’t already been said? These things rock, and you’ll save $80.
Chic goblets that look stolen from the Madonna Inn (in the best way possible)
A gooseneck kettle
There are tons of Fellow Stagg kettle lookalikes on Amazon, but this Bodum model isn’t just aesthetically pleasing; it’s also just $30.
The best Amazon Cyber Monday Deals on wellness, beauty, and skincare
Cerave’s derm-approved skincare
This starter pack is the perfect gift for your dude-friend who’s just realizing that he should be cleansing and moisturizing.
This super high-tech Oral B toothbrush is half off
The Genius X Limited “has learned from thousands of human brushing behaviors and instantly recognizes your brushing styles” and “gives you daily personal coaching to cover all areas evenly, with the right amount of pressure for the right time.” It has artificial intelligence, for chrissake, and it’s now under $100 for Cyber Monday.
Panasonic’s electric shavers—his and hers are both on sale
And both have a bajillion great reviews.
Sick gift idea: a Theragun-like massager for just $40
That Olaplex stuff people go nuts for
Score a 10-piece BDSM accessory collection for just $15
That’s the Cyber Monday spirit!
A wand vibrator with feel-good rumbles for under $25
Everyone loves this heated shiatsu massager
This shiatsu massager is like the Tom Hanks/Morgan Freeman/Dolly Parton of holiday presents, because who doesn’t love a deep tissue massage on-command? Great news—it’s 47% off.
Pheromone-infused fragrance oil for picking up babes
Does it work? Time for you to find out.
Sexual wellness products from Cake for 20% off
Genetic tests for you and your dog
They’re both on sale; why not?!
The best Amazon Cyber Monday Deals on outdoor gear and fitness
This top-rated home rowing machine
Exercise bikes for every budget
Yep, including a sale on Peloton bikes.
The only kettlebell you’ll ever need
It’s adjustable. Just turn the dial, and you can change your resistance from eight pounds all the way up to 40 pounds on this sturdy black rock, which would make a great addition to our winter home gym set-up.
The best reusable bottle
When we die, cremate us and put us in a Hydro Flask. If you’ve been waiting to grab one when the price drops, now’s the time, folks.
The best Amazon Cyber Monday Deals on home goods and mattresses
The best Cyber Monday mattress deals
Score big savings on top-rated memory foam mattresses from Nectar, Tuft & Needle, and Zinus.
Casper’s ultra-comfy pillows for less
A giant blanket
Seriously, it’s 10 feet by 10 feet.
Automate your pet care
Take a couple of things off your chore plate by getting an automatic cat feeder and self-cleaning litterbox (save $300!).
A faux Christmas tree to keep things easy year after year
The pre-lit one is 53% off.
A clothing steamer for blasting out wrinkles
Upgrade your stargazing with this pro telescope for under $200
Click, enjoy, and thank us later.
The Rec Room staff independently selected all of the stuff featured in this story. This story is being continuously updated to reflect new information and hot deals.
The post The Best Cyber Monday Amazon Deals, From TVs to Cookware appeared first on VICE.